Why does the saying “The shoemaker’s children go barefoot” exist? Because we can actually relate to this! Is it thus true that the teacher’s child will get less attention and help and probably struggle with their schoolwork?
Teachers and therapist are especially vulnerable when it comes to emotional burnout. They love their class and the kids that they teach or give therapy to and the reality is that they might use all their emotional energy while at school or at their practice. However, when they get home their own children will need exactly the same things they gave to their students and clients. Even when they are tired and feeling drained, their children will need their patience, presence and attention.
If you are a teacher or therapist and a mom, you should be aware of this risk and work towards finding a balance between your roles.
You could try the following:
- The golden rule is to look after yourself. You can’t pour anything from an empty cup so take the half an hour you need for yourself to recharge. Whether this is a bubble bath, watching something on television or taking a jog to clear your head, you will be a better mom afterwards.
- Make a conscious effort to listen to your child. Stop what you are doing and really listen. They want to share their day and troubles, but if they feel like you’re not really listening or that you’re not interested they will stop doing this. Once the communication gone it takes a lot of work to open it up that channel again.
- Have fun with your child, it will de-stress both of you. Remember to laugh at their jokes and to do things other than marking, homework, packing lunch boxes and stressing about the exam.
- Leave your work at work. Although it could be difficult at times, especially when you have to meet a deadline, you should try to be at home when you are home. Focus on the present and just be, don’t worry about what you still have to do. Prioritise your relationship with your children over work and make sure they know that you think they are more important.
- If you teach at the same school your child attends, try to avoid being your child’s class teacher. It could put stress on your relationship with your child.
Is this just a challenge for moms? Definitely not. Dads often find themselves in exactly the same situation. Stressed after a day at work and struggling to switch of and be in the moment at home. Kids nowadays also have a lot of pressure and could be stressed and moody when they get home. Discuss what each family member need and be a good role model of balance.
You might want to read about family game time.
